


there's always been a rainbow (hangin' over your head)

by Fives (janfives90)



Category: The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/F, Oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:15:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24957469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/janfives90/pseuds/Fives
Summary: “Do you think that rainbow up there is bringing a message to the gods?”“Maybe.” Alyssa shrugs. “Maybe it’s like the rainbow in Genesis. God’s done destroying my life, so He sent a rainbow as a ‘my bad’.”“I mean, maybe, but that one’s kind of a bummer.”
Relationships: Alyssa Greene/Emma Nolan
Comments: 3
Kudos: 89





	there's always been a rainbow (hangin' over your head)

“You know, in Greek mythology, rainbows were representative of Iris, the messenger goddess. She basically  _ was _ the rainbow, or it was how she moved between the human work and the godly world. Myths can be a bit wiggly with the details.”

“Please don’t turn cloudgazing into our literature homework. I left the house for a reason.”

“Sorry.” Emma turns her head, grinning as she lays in the grass next to Alyssa. “Cloudgazing, huh?”

“Yeah, like stargazing, but during the day.”

“I like it.”

Alyssa looks at her, a softness in her brown eyes that makes Emma’s stomach all swooshy. “Good. I was hoping you would.”

“Do you think that rainbow up there is bringing a message to the gods?”

“Maybe.” Alyssa shrugs. “Maybe it’s like the rainbow in Genesis. God’s done destroying my life, so He sent a rainbow as a ‘my bad’.”

“I mean, maybe, but that one’s kind of a bummer.”

Alyssa laughs despite herself. “Thank you for coming out here with me. I needed the air. My mom’s been…”

Emma gives a small, serious nod. “You lost a dad. She lost a husband. You’re both going through some shit.”

Alyssa laughs again, sharp and startled.  _ “Em!” _

“What?” Emma giggles.  _ “What? _ It’s true!”

“You said the s word.”

“You mean ‘shit’?”

“Emma!” Alyssa rolls onto her side and pokes Emma in the stomach. “Stop. You’re gonna forget someday and get in trouble. You know your dad hates when you curse.”

“It’d be worth it if it makes you laugh.”

Alyssa bites her lip. “You always make me laugh,” she says softly.

“Oh. Well. Okay, then. I’m not sure that’s a compliment, but-”

_ “Emma,” _ Alyssa groans, flopping down in the grass, her chin resting on Emma’s shoulder.

Emma just grins at her.

They lie in the grass, watching the clouds, until Alyssa murmurs, “Hey, Em?”

“Hm?”

“It’s never gonna get better, is it?”

Emma reaches over in a way that has to be uncomfortable, just so she can set a gentle hand on Alyssa’s back. “Sure it is,” she murmurs. “You saw the rainbow, right?”

Alyssa gives a small chuckle and moves closer to ease the awkward angle of Emma’s body. “Yeah. I guess you’re right.”

“I always am.”

“Let’s not push it.”

* * *

“Lys, please don’t be angry with me.”

“I’m not-” Alyssa sighs as she walks down the hallway of the high school. “Emma, I’m not angry with you.”

“You sure seem like you are. You won’t even look at me.”

“I-I do so.”

Emma continues to follow her like a lost puppy. “No, you don’t. Lys, please, I’ll just… If you want me to just pretend I’m not gay or something I will, I can’t-”

_ “What?” _ Alyssa stops so abruptly that Emma walks into her.

“Shit. Sorry,” Emma stammers, scrambling back a few steps as Alyssa turns around.

“You think I… Oh, God, Emma.” Alyssa grabs Emma by the collar of her jacket and drags her into a classroom, thankfully empty now that school is over for the day.

“Whatever you wanted to say, you could’ve said it in the hallway,” Emma says, sounding so glum, so…  _ not-Emma _ that it makes Alyssa’s heart break. “You’re not my friend here, Lys. You’re a cheerleader.”

“Those aren’t mutually exclusive, Emma.”

“According to Kaylee, they are.”

“I don’t live my life by the Rulebook of Amanda Kaylee Klein, and neither should you.”

Emma just shrugs, avoiding eye contact.

“Em,” Alyssa whispers. “Would you please look at me?”

It takes a while, so long that Alyssa thinks she stops breathing, but then Emma lifts her head.

“I don’t want you to pretend to be something you’re not. Do you understand me? It’s  _ okay. _ I’m not mad, or upset, or disgusted, or disappointed, or whatever it is that you think I am. You’re my friend, Emma. I love you no matter who you love.”

The ghost of something that’s nearly pain passes over Emma’s face, but then she nods and gives a tired smile. “Do you mean that?”

“Of course I do, idiot. I’m not mad at you, okay? I just had to think. I’ve been  _ worried.” _

Emma tilts her head to the side. “Worried about what?”

“We don’t exactly live in the Gay Friendly Capital Of The World. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“Oh. Well. Eh.”

“Don’t  _ ‘eh’ _ me.” Alyssa playfully slaps Emma’s shoulder. “Are you serious?”

“I mean, they already hate me for just generally being  _ weird, _ can it really get much worse?”

“Jesus,” Alyssa mutters, covering her eyes with her hand. “Never say that. Never, ever say that.”

“It’s not like I said Voldemort’s name or something- Oh, shit.”

Alyssa can’t help the laugh as she shoves Emma again, watching the grin spread across the other girl’s face. “I hate you.”

“No, you don’t.” Emma puts her hands in her pockets, looking almost smug. “You already said that you love me, Greene. No take-backs.”

“Who made that rule?”

“It’s a law.”

“Prove it.”

“It’s unwritten law.”

“That’s what I figured.”

* * *

Emma slams into her locker, hard.

She hears a faint snicker behind her, the sound of sneakered feet just slightly picking up their pace, but she wouldn’t bother to turn around even if it would make a difference.

There’s any number of classmates who would shove her up against her locker, and it’s not worth picking a fight with any of them.

Emma pulls out her math textbook and shoves it into her bag, mumbling her homework under her breath as she checks to make sure she has everything she’ll need for the night. She slings her backpack over one shoulder and snaps her locker closed, then turns around and feels all the air leave her lungs.

When the light comes in through the skylights  _ just right, _ it makes a little sparkly rainbow color wherever it hits.

Today, right now, it’s splashing the light across Alyssa as she walks down the hallways, and it makes Emma’s heart do maneuvers that would make Olympic gymnasts jealous.

“Em?”

Emma blinks, then her brain catches up and she realizes that Alyssa has stopped walking and is now standing right in front of her. “Oh, uh, sorry, yeah?”

“Could I talk to you for a minute?”

Alyssa seems nervous, which makes  _ Emma _ nervous.

“Yeah, of course you can.”

“Great.” Alyssa grabs Emma by the hand and pulls her down the hallway, into the band room. “It’s a good thing it’s such a nice day,” she says, almost as a distraction. “The band’s having their practice outside instead of in here.”

“Yeah.” Emma shoves her hands into her pockets. “What’s up, Lys?”

“I just…” Alyssa shrugs and starts to pace. “I wanted to ask you something that’s been bothering me. How do you know you’re a lesbian?”

“How… Uh.” Emma shifts her weight back and forth between her toes and her heels. “I dunno.”

_ “Emma,” _ Alyssa says, exasperated. “Come on. There has to be  _ something.” _

“I don’t know! I mean, sometimes when I look at girls my heart goes kind of squishy, and it’s never done that when I’ve looked at a boy? Or, uhm, when my aunt comes over at Thanksgiving and asks if I have a boyfriend my first thought is ‘wow, I’d rather die’.” When Alyssa just blinks at her, Emma winces. “I-I don’t really know how to explain this to you.”

“No, it’s okay,” Alyssa says softly. She sighs. “I think I understand.”

“You sound… sad.”

“No. Not sad.” She gives a small smile. “I needed clarification on something, and believe it or not, you gave it to me. It’s not sad. It’s a relief.”

Emma frowns, confused. “What clari-”

Alyssa kisses her.

It’s stupid at first, Alyssa clutching Emma’s flannel shirt like a lifeline while Emma’s hands feel like they’re glued to her pockets. Then the moment seems to sink in, unfreeze them, and they kiss like dumb teenagers who have wanted to kiss each other for years.

Emma spins Alyssa around, pushing her up against the band room door, and Alyssa gives a soft whine that brings Emma back to her senses.

“Wait,” Emma mumbles. “Wait a minute. What the hell is happening?”

Alyssa swallows, breathless. “I-I like you,” she stammers.

“You… You  _ like _ me?”

“I mean, I kind of figured that kissing you would make that obvious.”

Emma stares at her.

Alyssa bites her lip like she’s trying not to laugh. “Apparently not.”

“Don’t laugh at me. I’m so confused.”

“I’m not laughing at you,” Alyssa says gently, her hand coming up to brush against Emma’s cheek. “Maybe a little bit-”

_ “Hey.” _

“-but only because you’re cute.”

Emma grumbles, mollified.

Alyssa looks down, the nerves visibly back. “I like you, Emma. A lot. More than I thought made sense until I realized what it meant. What it  _ means. _ I’ve been thinking a lot lately, doing as much research as I can without my mom seeing. At first I excused it as just wanting to know more about you, but… the more I looked, the more I realized that I was looking for myself.”

“Oh, Lys,” Emma whispers.

“I don’t know if I… if I can really say it yet. I definitely can’t come out. I know that makes me a pretty lousy option for a date, but Em, I… I’d really, really like it if you-”

“Yes,” Emma says immediately.

Alyssa snorts. “What if I was going to ask you to help me find out if Shelby likes girls?”

“First of all, rude. Second of all…” Emma shrugs and wiggles her hand in front of her in a  _ so-so _ gesture.

“Oh come on, you don’t really think-”

“Look, all I’m saying is that straight girls don’t usually look at their best friends like that.”

Alyssa rolls her eyes. “Sure.”

Emma leans in and grins. “You always looked at  _ me _ like that.”

Alyssa shoves at her shoulder. “You’re hot when you’re smug, but it’s still annoying.”

“Huh.” Emma raises an eyebrow. “I’m  _ hot _ when I’m smug? Is that right?”

“Oh my God.” Alyssa groans and covers her face with her hands. “I truly am messing this whole confession up. Next I’ll admit that the first time I wanted to kiss you was when I saw you playing your guitar on the floor-” She stops abruptly.

“So I’m hot when I’m smug and when I’m playing guitar. Interesting. Out of curiosity, when else am I unbearably attractive, just so that I know what I should do more often.”

Alyssa shakes her head and grips the collar of Emma’s shirt again. “Shut up.”

“Okay, so the third one is when I’m not talking, got it. Little hard for me to do, but-”

Alyssa gives a sharp laugh as she pulls Emma in and kisses her again.

* * *

They lay on the floor of Emma’s room in her grandmother’s home, side by side, trying and failing to focus on their homework.

“This is boring,” Alyssa groans.

“You like science,” Emma says with a patient smile.

“I like science. I don’t like chemistry.”

“Are you sure about that?” Emma wiggles her eyebrows. “I’d say that we-”

“No.”

“-have pretty good-”

“Please no.”

“- _ chemistry _ between us.”

Alyssa gives another, even more pained groan and rests her head on her hands. “I hate you.”

“You don’t,” Emma says cheerfully.

“You’re right, I don’t,” Alyssa sighs.

“Mhm.”

“I love you.”

It’s said so simply that Emma doesn’t register it at first, and when she does, she looks at Alyssa sharply. “Wh… What did you say?”

Alyssa blushes. “I love you.”

Emma swallows, her eyes feeling watery. “I love you, too.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Well.” Alyssa grins and looks down at the floor. “Cool.”

_ “Cool?” _

“Shut up.”

Emma laughs so hard that she has to roll over onto her back to keep from face-planting onto her homework.

“Shut  _ up!” _ Alyssa, also laughing, half-heartedly tackles her, prodding her in the stomach.

Emma fights back, playful, rolling them over so that she’s on top of Alyssa, pinning her down.

The laughter stops abruptly, both of them catching their breath, a whole new series of feelings overwhelming them.

“Uhm,” Emma says, her throat dry.

“Uh.”

“So…”

“Uh-huh.”

Emma clears her throat and stops talking.

Alyssa slides her hands over Emma’s shoulders, bringing them to rest on the back of Emma’s neck. “I, uh. I think we need to talk about this sometime.”

“We do? I thought we were just supposed to ignore it and hope it went away until we were like thirty and married.”

“Em.”

“Okay. Serious mode.” Emma leans down and presses a soft kiss to Alyssa’s forehead. “I’m not doing anything until we’re both ready for it,” she murmurs. “And I’m not ready until you are.”

“I’m not ready until you are, either,” Alyssa whispers.

“Well, one of us is going to have to say it first, or we’ll be ninety before anything happens.” Alyssa laughs, and Emma kisses her forehead again. “The other thing is that uhm… I think we both need to make sure that we went in fully understanding that if by some miracle we did find the right time and right place, we probably wouldn’t again until after we graduated. Maybe not until we were away from here and in college.”

“You’re right. I hate that you’re right, but you’re right.”

Emma gives a small nod. “So I just. We have to make sure that if we find that space, find that time, we don’t end up expecting something from each other that we know we can’t give again until the timing doesn’t suck.”

Alyssa nods and kisses Emma softly. “I have to say,” she murmurs. “Serious Mode Emma Nolan is  _ very _ sexy.”

Emma chokes on her laugh, leaning down and pressing her face against Alyssa’s shoulder to muffle it. “Jesus Christ. You’re going to say that to me  _ now, _ while we’re still positioned like  _ this, _ while we’re talking about  _ that.” _

“Yep,” Alyssa says cheerfully. “It’s fun to get you back on occasion.”

Emma sighs into her shirt. “You’re the worst.”

“Nope. You said you love me.” Alyssa smirks. “No take-backs.”

  
  


* * *

“So, like, the rainbow flag is the gay flag, right?”

Emma laughs. “It’s a bit more complicated than that, but yeah. There’s also one specifically for lesbians, but pink’s not really my thing.”

Alyssa tilts her head, curious. “It’s pink?”

“Kinda depends on which one you’re looking at, but yeah.” Emma digs her phone out and opens an image, showing Alyssa the pinks and oranges of the flag in question.

Alyssa looks at it for a long moment, then gives a small giggle.

“What?” Emma asks as she puts her phone away.

“My mom wants to go shopping for prom dresses this weekend. She’d  _ love _ it if I suggested pink, the girliest color she could think of.”

“You know, historically, pink was actually considered a masculine color-”

“Em. I’d love to know about that later, but please keep up with me here.”

“I really don’t think I know where it’s going.”

Alyssa grins and leans over, pressing a kiss to Emma’s shoulder. “An in-joke. She’ll be letting me wear pink, thinking it’s all going according to the heteroplan…”

“...but you’ll actually be getting it because it’s the gayest color you can wear,” Emma finishes. “Crafty. Silly. I love it.”

* * *

“So.”

“So.”

“You, uh.” Emma leans against the lockers and rubs the back of her neck. “You kinda just outed yourself to everybody.”

“And my mom.”

“Yeah, your mom’s included in the ‘everybody’.” Emma rubs her hands together, watching Alyssa pace. “Are you okay?”

“I feel… I feel…” Alyssa laughs. “You know, I think I feel better than I have in years. The only time I’ve felt even close to this is when it’s been you and me together.”

“Well, that was only that one time-”

Alyssa puts a hand over her mouth. “I meant just the two of us together in any capacity.”

Emma winces and pulls Alyssa’s hand down. “Ah. Right. Sorry.” She bows her head. “I’m, uh… I’m sorry about a lot of things, actually.”

Alyssa steps closer. “So am I.” She cups Emma’s face in her hands and kisses her, long and slow. “I know we need to talk about them, but why don’t we do it after the prom you worked so hard on?”

Emma grins slowly. “Yeah. Yeah, that sounds nice.” She sets her hands on Alyssa’s hips. “Before we go, though? I love you, too, Alyssa Greene.”

“Good.” Alyssa hugs her tightly, making a sound like a sob that’s cut short.  _ “Good.” _

“Aren’t you going to say ‘cool’ again?”

“I changed my mind. We’re staying broken up.”

Emma laughs and hugs her tighter. “Not a chance.”

  
  


* * *

Alyssa lies on top of Emma in the back of Emma’s pickup truck, half-dozing in the warm afternoon sun.

“Hey,” Emma murmurs. “Are you ready for all of this?”

“Ready for what?”

“College. Moving away from home for so long.”

“Yeah. In a way, I think it’s a relief. The only things I really ever liked about this town were you, my mom, and, on good days, Shelby and Kaylee. With Shelby and Kaylee both going to Penn State and you and me going to New York, the only thing here for me is my mom- and Betsy now, too -and we can easily come home to visit them for a weekend or something.”

“I feel the same way. The only thing that would’ve ever kept me here was you and Gran, and, well, you’ll be with me and Gran’s not hard to get home to whenever we want.” Emma pauses. “Kaylee and Shelby are going to  _ Penn State?” _

“Yeah, so?”

“Isn’t that, like, on the list of top party schools?”

Alyssa squints up at her. “I don’t know. Maybe? That wasn’t exactly in my college search criteria. Why?”

“Nothing.” Emma shrugs. “Just placing bets now on how long before they get wasted at a party and hook up.”

_ “Em!” _

“What?” Emma asks innocently.

“Don’t  _ bet _ on their- Jesus.  _ Jesus. _ I can’t think about this.”

Emma laughs and rests her head back, closing her eyes. “Oh, man,” she sighs. “It’s been a year. It’s been a  _ life. _ I hope the next seventeen years aren’t as much of a bitch as the first seventeen.”

Alyssa turns her head. “I think they’ll be better.”

“Hm. Why, because you’ll be in them?”

“Well, yeah, but also because of the sky.”

Emma lifts her head and frowns, confused. “The sky?”

“Yeah.” Alyssa points up and smiles. “Don’t you see the rainbow?”


End file.
